Those Two Holiday Gifts

As I began doing with the last email, I begin this blog by sharing some of the latest research. My plan is that the second half of each blog is going to be more personal.  This time it will contain the second of my two holiday gifts.  But here is the latest research and my first gift:

Great news! The First Gift is a Big, Big step for the Research on HSPs:

Pluess, M., Aron, E., Kähkönen, J. E., Lionetti, F., Yuanyuan, H., Tillman, T., Greven, C., & Aron, A. (2024). Evolution of the Concept of Sensitivity and its Measurement: The Highly Sensitive Person Scale – Revised. PsyArXiv https://osf.io/preprints/psyarxiv/w7bqu

This above is the citation with a link to the article on the revised measure of high sensitivity, HSP-R, which after several years of work and research, has finally been unveiled for all to see, at least in preprint form. Being a preprint means that it has not yet been officially accepted for publication by a journal—that is in process–and is not yet up on our websites with cutoffs and all that. But you can at least look at the items, on pages 25 and 26 of the article. There will be a usable pdf of the scale soon. 

Next year, perhaps after it is published in a journal, there will be an official “launch” of HSP-R, with a webinar by we the authors to explain the six factors and details about how to use it. But for now, please do not copy the scale or use it  for any purpose. It’s possible that there will be slight changes, at least in the article if not in the scale.  This is a preprint. (If you want to use it in research right away, contact Michael Pluess at m.pluess@surrey.ac.uk.)     

You will see that this new measure is shorter, eighteen items, and has six factors, with a nice balance of positive and negative factors and items. The six factors, with three items in each, are Sensitivity to Details, Depth of Processing, Social Sensitivity, Sensitivity to Positive Experiences, Emotional Reactivity, and Overstimulation. Nice, yes? 

To quote from the article,

The new items were drafted, carefully considered, and continuously adapted in an iterative process through a series of team meetings. This process resulted in 65 new items. To acknowledge the relevance of participatory research (Cornwall & Jewkes, 1995), these 65 items were then rated further in an online survey by a group of 34 international experts on sensitivity (including academic researchers as well as practitioners), regarding how well these items reflect sensitivity and how understandable they are. After dropping some items and modifying them further based on expert feedback, the final selection was 61 new sensitivity items (see Supplementary Materials for a list of all 61 items). The 61 new items together with the 27 original HSP items were then included in the current study, resulting in a total of 88 sensitivity items [tested for inclusion]/.

Then 1000 participants answered these items plus items on other questionnaires to provide the various inputs we needed to know how to reduce the 88 to the very best 18,

Other Recent Research

About the latest research,  besides the new measure of high sensitivity, there has been quite a bit, but nothing I am so impressed by that I am going to describe it in detail. Some of the latest studies showing up on Google Scholar have serious flaws, and others simply do not provide very interesting new results. (For example, studies showing that HS dentists and teachers suffer more from burnout than others; HSPs with more Adverse Childhood Experiences or ACEs are more likely to be depressed; HSPs have more difficulty with emotional regulation; silly stuff again about HSPs and narcissism, etc.)

Here is a study you might like:

 MALEWSKA, K., CHOMICKI, M., & NOWAK, P. (2024). INTUITION IN DECISION-MAKING IN THE CONTEXT OF HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSONS. Scientific Papers of Silesian University of Technology. Organization & Management/Zeszyty Naukowe Politechniki Slaskiej. Seria Organizacji i Zarzadzanie, (205).

These researchers found that HS managers use intuition more than others to make decisions. Less thrilling was the result that HSPs in general who score higher on items the authors determined to be negative on the HSP Scale, reported using intuition more often than others to make a decision, while those scoring higher on positive items used less intuition. “Counter-intuitive,” right? But if you think of intuition as making decisions without processing the details very long, it might make sense that stressed HSPs use intuition to decide quickly and get past the discomfort of uncertainty.  But ordinary HSPs, preferring to process before jumping to a conclusion, might, as the study found, use less intuition in making a decision. As for the result that HS managers use more intuition, they of course may be forced to use intuition often than the rest of us, when there is simply too little information to be certain about what to do.  

However, like all the research up to now, this study used the old HSP scale. While the old scale correlates well overall with the new one, the explicit factors in the new one are going to be much more useful in research.

The Second Gift–A Shift in the Focus of my Blogs

To begin, I want to thank you all for reading what I write, some of you doing it for years, and now patiently reading about the changes I want to make.  Thank you.  About those changes, recently I declared that the subject of the first half of all future blogs would be the latest research on HSPs. I thought the second half would be about more personal experiences relevant to HSPs, as when I wrote about the conflict between my HSP and high sensation seeking part during my trip to Europe last fall.

Now I have decided that the second half of each blog will more often reflect my burgeoning interest in what some people call “spirituality.” If “spirituality” makes you uncomfortable, I will address that in a moment. These second halves will still relate to the needs of HSPs, but with a new focus. This is partly because, having written articles for you all since 2004, I have simply written myself out. Yes, it’s the holidays, but I have already written some advice for you on that. Here are past blogs offering support for HSPs during the holidays. Plus there are now also zillions of websites for HSPs with advice for you–some good, some not, but I trust you can decide.  

Further, I have become uncomfortable with making generalizations about HSPs, beyond what we know from research. I’m also less comfortable giving general advice (rather than suggestions to individuals I have gotten to know). It has struck me that we are all really different. In fact, I’ve written about this recently [https://hsperson.com/on-being-a-unique-hsp/] I first noticed my discomfort about making generalizations during the pandemic, hearing the constant question “How are HSPs handling the pandemic?”  I wanted to shout, “How should I know? How are left-handed people handling it? HSPs and their situations are all different.” Or as I liked to say then, “We’re not all in the same boat—we’re in the same storm, but different boats.”

Why this Deepening of my Subject Matter?

Simply put, there is so much more stress these days affecting everyone, but HSPs especially. And I think the best answers come from deeper places.  There’s stress about climate change and how the earth and its species are being affected. Stress about the current violence leading to shocking human suffering in the Middle East, the Ukraine, and the Sudan, to name only a few cases. And the U.S. election generated intense feelings for many U.S. citizens, HSPs especially–both those deeply distressed by the outcome and coming changes and those delighted by all of it. But even if you were happy with the results, there have been and always will be tough times.

I have always written on deeper subjects, going back to when I began the newsletter “Comfort Zone.” There were articles on meditation, enlightenment, and all sorts of ideas. I’ve changed my mind a little on some details, so do not rush to read everything you find when you search for “spirituality” in the search boxes on the website. The point is, you will see more of that now and hopefully better.  

I think most of you will like this change, now that there is so much other advice of other kinds available for HSPs in other places. This is why I dared to call this shift my second holiday gift to you.  Although I have no research on the point, I believe HSP are especially drawn to this topic. Obviously I am. But it is not an exclusively HSP topic, so feel free to share the upcoming blogs with non-HSPs.  

What If You Dislike Everything to do with “Spirituality”?

I worried considerably that some of you, my faithful readers, may not like this change in emphasis. You may think, “Why can’t she stick with facts or useful things?” To my mind, I will still be factual and useful. But in a new way.  

However, maybe you just hate the term “spirituality.” But before you delete the bottom half of every blog, or unsubscribe altogether out of sheer disgust, keep in mind that “spirituality” is a large topic, like “education” or “business.” A few people will hate one of these because of past bad experience with them, so if you hate this particular subject, “spirituality,” maybe look at your past experiences with it so that you are not kept from what might be useful here, just as you would not want to be kept away from fresh news about education or business.  

Many people dislike the topic of spirituality because to them it equates with religion. But the two are not the same. The suffering caused by religious wars and inquisitions has been the product of very cruel, inhumane humans, not the product of either religion or spirituality. If your problem with religion is that you don’t like the dogma or you get nothing from the rituals, well, you are not alone. More and more people respond to surveys on this topic that they are “spiritual but not religious.” So again, do not equate spirituality with religion.

So what is spirituality? Strictly speaking, it is all the stuff that is not material, not physical matter. That sounds like we are drifting into unreality, but for example values are very real, very influential, yet nonmaterial. And for most people spirituality can be reduced to what they value, what is meaningful to them and very, very real. They might say they find their meaning in life in their love of family, or being in nature, or their creative expression in the arts or music, or a special connection with pets, or, yes, with God. All of these are beyond physical matter. “Spiritual.” Can you live with that definition of spirituality? Shall we get on with one way that spirituality can help in a practical way when trying to cope with pain, loss, and disappointment?

What Helps with Pain? Access to Two Fields of Life

Because this blog is already long, I will only introduce here the widely known, ironically secret answer to dealing with rough times.  I have been reading extensively about Eastern spirituality and the Western “mystical” traditions, and all of it offers the same answer, yet not widely known: There are two fields of life, or you can say two experiences of life. The first is what can be called the relative, and the other is the absolute, the transcendent, God when we speak of God as that which is beyond opposites and the source of all.  

(I have to interject here that if you have been following certain spiritual paths long enough, you may come to see everything relative is actually included in the transcendent, so that there is really only one field of life. That is sometimes called “non-duality.” But collapsing everything into one transcendent field would be getting ahead of ourselves, and most spiritual people are comfortable with talking about two fields of life, at least to start with.)

The relative is in a sense all that we “have.” It’s our selves, our bodies, our lives. Everything we experience. We don’t want to lose that. But it is basically “stuff”–a lot of stuff—good things, bad things, objects, people, our thoughts and feelings, our values, our suffering, and yes, our brand of spirituality.  But with certain experiences, we come to see that there is more than the relative, that the relative is only the absolute divided into an infinite number of pieces. The absolute is a wholeness, without parts or qualities. 

So what is this wholeness, this other half of existence that we can also experience? Some of you will be so familiar with it that you will find this entirely too elementary. Yet you would admit that it is hard to put into words. That is because it actually is beyond words, since describing anything in words always limits it by giving it qualities or attributes, by chopping it back up into pieces. But again, probably most of you know what I am talking about. HSPs especially. We specialize in sensing what is deeper, so why not what is the deepest?  But many who are not HSPs also know this experience.

As an experience, maybe the absolute is best described as a sense of infinite silence and unboundedness, sometimes by itself and sometimes connected to a “relative” experience, such as when we walk into a big, nearly empty cathedral or a large forest. There may be sounds or things to look at, yet there is some sense of silence or unboundedness permeating everything. You might experience it as love or bliss, but in this case these are not emotions attached to anything. They are pure. While you are in that experience, you are not thinking however. It is just pure awareness. Of course thoughts do come and go, so we can think about what happened after we touch there. But this sense of unboundedness is what gives the absolute the reputation of being beyond everything or the source of everything.  Transcendent.

But How Does the Experience of These Two, Together, Help with Suffering?

What does this talk of two fields of life have to do with pain, suffering, and loss? Experiencing these two fields does not end suffering. For example, Meister Eckart, the renowned Medieval Christian mystic, was asked why Jesus wept bitterly before his crucifixion and Mary grieved deeply during it if they were both divine. Eckart said they, and all of us, have a human side and a divine, transcendental side. As humans, they suffered. As we must, living in a body, in the relative. But the degree that we are also connected to the divine, or whatever you choose to call it, we are also outside of the realm of human suffering, both at once.

In short, you can manage suffering, according to all of the spiritual traditions, by knowing both fields of life and grounding your relative life in the experience of the absolute. I keep saying “experience” because it is not just an idea, a philosophy, or even an attitude of faith or love. For it to help, it has to be situated deeper. It has to be a quality of the overall brain’s functioning (usually as coherent brain waves), an ability you have developed that allows your brain to provide this experience of the absolute. 

Sometimes the experience is brief. For other people it is a constant background. Sometimes it comes naturally to a person, sometimes suddenly when under stress, but most often through purposeful practices, like meditation and contemplative prayer. But however we come by it, all the traditions say we function better in the world the more we have access to this experience. We are less distressed by events in the relative, such as illnesses, the death of a loved one, economic losses, the outcome of elections, and all the rest. The relative is there, but something much larger, infinite, is also there.

This is Not About Escaping All Pain or Ignoring Problems

Touching in with that “something larger” does not mean just “putting things in perspective,” although it can, but it creates a physically measurable calmness which makes us more effective. It is very important to realize that the transcendent experience does not mean avoiding, denying, or dissociating from what is painful. Rather, it allows us to take the best action, the wisest one within our powers, and to work with others more effectively. 

The Bhagavad Gita is one of the best known Eastern scriptures. In it Krisha, a legendary teacher, is driving the chariot of his student, Arjuna, at the moment when Arjuna has to start a war by shooting the first arrow. This is a horrific war that is going to kill most of his family and friends, who are on both sides. But it was a war that was necessary, according to the story, to restore justice. So Krishna used this moment to give the terrified Ajuna a simple instruction that is at the heart of all “spiritual” teachings: “Established in Being perform action.” Get yourself soundly grounded in the absolute (God if you like) before going forth.

Notice Krishna did not advise Arjuna to give up the fight and withdraw from the world. He had his duty to carry out. Krishn said act. But act from the level of the transcendent. Today he might say fight climate change (I avoid discussing politics, but I do stick to the facts), just as the Dalai Lama told his followers to do. We cannot fail to act.

Applying the Two Field to Your Life

Maybe you still wonder how does this knowledge of two fields really help when we feel horrible, emotionally or physically? What about grief? Arjuna’s terror? I promised you facts and practical information. With the right approach, the bad feelings do not go away, but they occur within a larger neurological field. (For a Tibetan Buddhist approach, see Andrew Holecek’s Reverse Meditation: How to Use Your Pain and Most Difficult Emotions as the Doorway to Inner Freedom. I am not saying you should necessarily adopt his methods, but you will see how the two fields work together.) The overall brain is calm, coherent, transcending, yet also distressed at specific places in the brain, where it deals with the relative. Relative and transcendent. Two fields of life. Two kinds of brain functioning if you will, and the more you can access the transcendent, the better you can handle the relative.  

What can you do right now to ground yourself in Being? The methods are myriad. There are several in every tradition. But unless you are one of the lucky ones who goes there easily, always, changing how your brain works almost always involves regular practice: Contemplative prayer, meditation, or whatever takes you down to the transcendent. You have to train the brain to go there with regular, consistent practice. This should not feel like “work,” however. The right practice for you should be a real pleasure to do and have daily benefits. There, as I promised–spirituality that is practical and factual. Happy holidays.